Juventus and AC Milan each played to scoreless draws Sunday as the top of Serie A remained unchanged, but Milan standout Zlatan Ibrahimovic was sent off for hitting an opponent and could face a multi-game ban. In the 64th minute of Milan's match with Napoli, Ibrahimovic slapped his right hand on the side of Salvatore Aronica's face.

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Full time, Chelsea 3-3 Manchester United: The corner comes to nothing, and that's that. What an invigorating game that was. Boos greet the final whistle, Chelsea fans simultaneously furious with Howard Webb for giving two penalties against them and also for their team throwing it away.

90 min+5: Another save from De Gea! Cahill bursts forward and unleashes a piledriver that De Gea tips over. It was right above him, to be fair.

90 min+3: Evra wins a corner for United on the left. Giggs whips it in and there's a shout for handball against Torres, but Webb's not about to give a third penalty. The ball comes out to Carrick, whose volley is held by Cech.

90 min+2: What a save from De Gea. Mata got his free-kick up and over the wall, and it was destined for the top-right corner, only for De Gea to leap to his left and tip it wide.

90 min+1: There will be four minutes for either side to find a winner. Scholes starts stoppage time by doing what he does best, knocking over Luiz 30 yards from United's goal. Mata will take it.

90 min: Chelsea have completely lost the run of themselves here. They've really missed the leadership of, well, John Terry since the first United goal.

87 min: Park has come on for Welbeck by the way. Incredible Meireles has a chance to hit back instantly for Chelsea but puts a free header over from six yards out, completely mistiming his jump as he met the cross.

86 min: But for a small corner in the Shed End, Stamford Bridge is silent. Nothing could sum up United better than this comeback. It's like something out of the Treble year.

INCREDIBLE! Chelsea 3-3 Manchester United (Hernandez, 84 min): They just will not lie down. Chelsea thought they had escaped when Valencia stormed down the right, outpacing Essien, and found Rooney in the middle. He found Rooney in the middle and smashed the ball goalwards, bringing the best out of Cech, who pushed it out to the left. But there was Giggs and he dinked the ball back into the six-yard box where the arch-poacher, Javier Hernandez, was left unmarked and he made no mistake with his header despite the best efforts of Cech. They're going to win this.

83 min: "It's a poor condemnation of Torres where in your photo of him and Jonny Evans, the latter is outscoring him for Chelsea," honks Duncan Smith.

82 min: Giggs clips a corner to the near post from the left, but although he gets in front of his man, Welbeck can only direct is header well off target. "The constant mantra is that Torres hasn't lost it and will get it back at some point but if film-makers can lose it (M. Night Shyamalan), if comedians can lose it (supposedly, there was a time when Ben Elton was funny), if bands can lose it (the Rolling Stones after 'Exile on Main St.') why not goal scorers?" asks Steven Hughes.

81 min: Carrick finds Welbeck on the edge of the area. Cahill, in the best John Terry style, blocks his shot. The home crowd are on the edge of their seats now.

78 min: He didn't shoot. Instead he got tackled. His confidence in front of goal is at an all-time low. You'd have to wonder what would happen if a Torres shot ended up on target with De Gea in goal. Probably a split in the time-space continuum, with Andy Carroll ending up as Prime Minister.

77 min: Torres should wrap it up. Torres has to score. Shoot, Torres. Shoot! You're seven yards out, shoot!

76 min: Torres controls a Malouda pass on his chest and lays the ball off to Essien, who thunders a shot down De Gea's throat. He punches it over.

74 min, part two: The comeback was nearly complete. Romeu disastrously gives the ball away to Carrick and before Chelsea know it, Giggs has played Hernandez in on the right side of the area. Faced by Luiz, he shifts the ball to the right, and then pulls his shot across goal and a few yards wide. A poor finish by his standards.

74 min: Essien skelps one into the Matthew Harding Upper. "Following on from David Karjanen wondering why Man City let Sturridge go, I seem to recall it was because of his ridiculous wage demands," says Paul Boardman, who could be right. "He's obviously a talent, but whenever I see him play, that rather colours my view of him, I must say. Maybe it was all his agent's fault. As we know, all agents are essentially evil, after all..."

72 min: It's all Manchester United now. Chelsea are going to be playing exclusively on the break.

71 min: Chelsea look to beef up their midfield by introducing Oriol Romeu for Sturridge. The second penalty was unlucky for Chelsea. Welbeck was certainly looking for it and Ivanovic didn't do a lot. Still, there was contact.

GOAL! Chelsea 3-2 Manchester United (Rooney pen, 69 min): For the second game in a row, United have scored twice from the spot and suddenly the most dramatic of comebacks is on. Rooney goes low this time and into the opposite corner, but again Cech goes the wrong way. They couldn't, could they? They've had some escape acts in the past. This would be up there.

68 min: ANOTHER PENALTY TO MANCHESTER UNITED! But it's unlikely. Welbeck almost kicks Ivanovic's foot and goes down. Webb points to the spot.

67 min: Far too open. United are attacking with much more poise now. Giggs and Hernandez combine to set up Rooney on the edge of the area but his low shot doesn't quite have enough on it to beat Cech.

66 min: Luiz pierces United's defence down the left with a wonderful pass through to Malouda. His cutback to Torres is cut out, but only comes to Mata, who steers a drive straight at De Gea. Up the other end, Rooney hammers one wide from 25 yards out. It's too open for Chelsea's liking.

64 min: And now Scholes is on for Rafael. Valencia goes to right-back. Despite getting the goal back, United don't particularly look like staging an unlikely comeback.

63 min: Paul Scholes is getting ready to come on. "That penalty award encapsulates everything wrong with Howard Webb as a referee," says Jonathan Francis. "He's happy to make that decision when it no longer matters, but he never gives it if the score was 1-0, or 0-0 as when he bottled those decisions in the first ten minutes. That's not to excuse United's defending this half, but why does the FA persist in giving Webb matches beyond his capabilities?" He can do 1,000 press-ups.

61 min: Looking to make amends, Sturridge drags a low shot well wide. He needs to just calm down a little. "Same feeling watching Luiz score as I used to get when Phillipe Albert or Frank Lebouf scored," says Darren McVeigh. "Horrible."

59 min: It was a foolish challenge from Sturridge, who caught the back of Evra's foot. On Sky, Geoff Shreeves informs us that just before Sturridge gave away the penalty, Villas-Boas had berated him for not tracking back. He might be regretting that.

GOAL! Chelsea 3-1 Manchester United (Rooney pen, 58 min): Rooney missed one against Chelsea earlier this season, but not this time. This was unstoppable, slammed into the top-left corner. Cech went the other way, not that it would have made any difference. Now then.

57 min: PENALTY TO MANCHESTER UNITED! Evra breaks into the area and Sturridge clumsily brings him down. This game is all about these two.

56 min: Chris Sutton scored when Chelsea beat Manchester United 5-0 in October 2000.

56 min: "Thursday nights, Channel Five!" crow the Chelsea fans.

55 min: There's a leak in the roof of one of the stands, but not as many as there are in the United defence. "Why did we let Sturridge go?" says David Karjanen, a Manchester City fan. To be fair, you're not doing too badly without him. He is a special talent though.

54 min: So, was Mata's volley better than Robin van Persie's against Everton? "I've eaten my words Jacob, and very quickly at that," says William Macpherson of Torres. "Perhaps he should play on the wing?"

53 min: The woeful Ashley Young is replaced by Javier Hernandez.

GOAL! Chelsea 3-0 Manchester United (Luiz, 51 min): United have completely fallent to pieces. Mata swings the free-kick towards the far post, where no one has bothered to pick up Luiz. He makes a mess of the header, the ball coming off his shoulder, but it didn't matter as it hit Ferdinand and looped into the top-right corner. All they need now is a Torres goal.

50 min: Sturridge embarrassed Gael Clichy, and now he's doing the same to Patrice Evra. He skins the United full-back again and wins the foul. Evra is booked. Chelsea have a free-kick on the right flank, and ...

49 min: Meireles gets excited and wafts a shot from 30 yards well over the top. United are in real trouble now. Their miserable run at Stamford Bridge looks like going on.

WHAT A GOAL!!! Chelsea 2-0 Manchester United (Mata, 46 min): Fernando Torres isn't scoring at the moment, but Chelsea won't care if he keeps laying them on for goals like this. He peels off to the right flank and swings a peach of a cross to the far post. With every United defender drawn to the near post, Mata is left all alone 10 yards from goal. Instead of taking it down, he meets the ball on the volley with his left foot and the ball screams past David De Gea, probably deafening him in the process, and into the roof of the net. What technique. That was incredible.

46 min: No changes for either side at half time. Chelsea get us going again, and ...

Half time emails:

"Hello Jacob, has any kind soul actually offered an irony-free answer to your question at Minute Three?" says Tim Lawler. Thankfully not. "That might liven up half-time. Apparently he has this brother, see, whom..."

"Rooney spends more money than I've ever owned on some hair then shaves half of it off," blasts Tom Saggers.

"Yet again United look to be on top but don't make it count and end up conceding," says Simon Reece.

"Maybe Torres should start playing centre back, as Chris Sutton did for Celtic, because he is absolutely hopeless up front," says William Macpherson. "He makes Andy Carrol look good."

Half time: Chelsea 1-0 Manchester United: Chelsea survive more late pressure from United and once the ball is cleared, the whistle blows for half time.

45 min+2: Another free-kick for United, as Giggs rolls back the years, skips past a few challenges and draws the foul from Mata. The home fans howl their disapproval, but Mata was late. Giggs taps the free-kick to his right for Rooney, who fizzes a low drive from 35 yards out towards the bottom-left corner. Cech gets down well to push it wide, although it might already have been heading off-target.

45 min: There will be two minutes of added time. Chelsea are holding on a little now, and Ivanovic betrays their panic by bumping into Young on the left and earning a booking.

44 min: Webb marks a fine half of refereeing by giving a free-kick against Ivanovic for getting the ball when he tackled Evra.

42 min: United are trying to Arsenal it into the net. Won't someone just have a shot?

41 min: Cech preserves Chelsea's lead again, though United got a little lucky with this chance. Welbeck tried to play a one-two with Rooney on the edge of the area. The pass wasn't good enough but rebounded off the unwitting Meireles and back to Welbeck, whose first-time shot was palmed behind by Cech. A good save, but he would have been disappointed if it had gone in.

38 min: But not that rattled. Young cuts in from the left and tries to bend one into the far corner. Cech plunges to his left and pushes the effort aside, the rebound just evading Rooney.

37 min: Having made the goal, Sturridge wants one for himself now. He finds himself in a pocket of space outside the area and lets fly with a stinging drive that De Gea beats away. United are rattled.

GOAL! Chelsea 1-0 Manchester United (Evans own goal, 36 min): It just gets worse for Patrice Evra. After a scrappy period of play, the ball bobbled to Sturridge on the right side of the area. Faced by Evra and with little room to work with, he somehow tricked his way past the left-back, making his way to the byline. He could only cut it back, such was the angle, and managed to dig it past De Gea and on to the chest of the unlucky Evans, who could only divert it into his own goal. That goal was all down to Sturridge, who beat Evra so easily. He made Chelsea's first goal against Manchester City in similar fashion, and he's done it again. He's such a talent.

33 min: Roars of laughter on Merseyside as a cross from Mata slams straight into Evra's face, almost knocking him out. This match is best watched to this music.

30 min: Torres is booked for clattering into the back of Evans as they chased down a loose ball. The challenge hurt Evans, though a booking looked a bit harsh.

29 min: Ivanovic stops Welbeck from giving United the lead with a brilliant last-ditch challenge. Chelsea were torn to pieces by a simple but excellent pass over the top from Valencia to Rooney, the hosts pulling off the worst offside trap since this effort from United in 1980. Instead of shooting, Rooney decides to give Welbeck an open goal with a pass across the area. Cahill and Cech were taken out of the picture altogether, but Ivanovic slid in to clear as Welbeck prepared to slide the ball home.

27 min: Luiz has had a quiet start to this game. A little too quiet, so he puts the clown costume on and hands the ball straight to Giggs, who overcooks his pass through to Young. That sums this game up.

25 min: De Gea does well to punch away a Mata free-kick from the right with Cahill nearby. There. United break forward at speed but Young is caught offside from Rooney's pass despite looking down the line.

23 min: The problems facing a right-footed left-back are highlighted when instead of going down the outside, Bosingwa tries to skip inside Rafael, who reads his intentions like Charlie Adam devours James Corden tomes and wins the free-kick off him. "I'm sure Webb's appointment to any Man Utd. match elicits groans of dread or a quiet "YES!" from everyone involved, depending on who you support," says Linda Howard. "Is he trying to work on his reputation? Doesn't he know either way he can't win? That is LITERALLY the nature of his profession."

21 min: Torres continues his Chris Sutton impression by slicing miles wide of the right post from 25 yards out. For a moment, he had the United defence on the run, and then he did that. How did this happen? Where did it all go wrong? It's not long before he's got a sniff of the ball again, and sure enough, his lay-off goes behind Sturridge, handing possession back to United.

20 min: Ferdinand strides forward from the back and is roundly booed by the Chelsea fans. Well done football!

19 min: Meireles, who's gone for the toupée look today, sends a dreadful free-kick into the United area. It's cleared with contempt. Chelsea's set-pieces have been crummy so far.

17 min: United look so dangerous on the counter-attack. And indeed when they have the ball. Chelsea's attack is so ponderous at the moment. Anyway, Young has a sight of goal on the edge of the area, but takes too long to shoot and when he does, the pace is taken off the effort by Cahill's block. The shot spins up and Cech saves easily, preventing a corner. A lot of United's moves are falling down at the feet of Young.

15 min: Still, that's one in the eye for Liverpool fans those who claim Howard Webb is United's 12th man.

13 min: United felt they were hard done by by refereeing decisions during their defeat at Stamford Bridge last season. Expect that decision to be referenced after this match should they lose. Ferguson is still blowing hot heat into the fourth official's ear on the touchline.

11 min: Howard Webb, England's top referee. Giggs slips Welbeck through the middle, and the United striker's touch takes it away from the Cahill, who slides in, misses the ball and takes out Welbeck. It's probably just outside the area, but arguably a red card as Welbeck would have been through. Amazingly Webb waves play on. He's bottled that. United are livid.

9 min: Ashley Young wriggles and twists and turns in the area, somehow holding on to the ball, before falling over his own feet. He wants a penalty, but Howard Webb gives a free-kick to Chelsea for handball by Young. "The good thing about playing Bosingwa and Luiz is that it will save Gary Cahill from any criticism possible if Chelsea's defence have a wobble today," says Sasu Laaksonen. "So no pressure there Gary, the FWA is on your side."

7 min: Mata's corner from the right is low and all Cahill can do is divert it out of the area to Malouda, whose volley is deflected wide for another corner, this time on the left. Meireles whips it to the far post, where Ivanovic heads it back across goal. Carrick heads it up into the air and under no pressure at all, De Gea flaps haplessly at the punch. Oh dear. It comes to Meireles on the left, but this is just insulting, a shot from a ludicrous angle that flies into the side-netting.

6 min: Not a bad start from Chelsea, this. Sturridge has a pop from distance. It's going well wide, but a deflection takes it even further wide, giving Chelsea their first corner.

5 min: A sloppy pass from Ferdinand gives Sturridge a chance to attack United on the right. He tries a couple of stepovers, but then drags his cross straight into the arms of De Gea, who manages not to throw the ball into his own net. That's cheap, isn't it? He's obviously going to be a very good goalkeeper.

3 min: Sturridge nearly plays Mata through the middle, but Ferdinand does well to cut the pass out. For some reason, Ferdinand is being booed by the Chelsea fans. Can anyone tell me why? They can't still be annoyed about that Merking Show in 2006. "I wonder a bit if the old ire and dander would be up a bit more for Torres if Vidic were out there" says Linda Howard. "That was always fun."

2 min: Essien trips Evra 25 yards from goal, giving United a free-kick in a promising position. Rooney curls it over the wall with his right foot, but it curves harmlessly past the near post. "One of Morgan's co-pundits on Fox just informed us that Tim Cahill will start for Chelsea in central defence," says Adam in New York. "Someone should urgently let the Everton midfielder know he's needed at Stamford Bridge."

1 min: Off we go, United getting us underway and attacking from right to left in the first half. Meanwhile, I bet the people complaining here are the kind of people who stand on the left on the escalator on the tube. Oh humanity.

The teams are in the tunnel. Patrice Evra and Petr Cech, the two captains, share some BANTER. Always good to see. "I had an exceptionally vivid dream about this match the other night, so vivid that I've placed a bet on it - and I never bet on sport," says Nick Pettigrew. "Ever. In the dream, Torres scored a hat trick. I've pissed my money away, haven't I?" If it's any consolation, he did score against United in September.

Andre Villas-Boas says that he's picked Jose Bosingwa instead of Ryan Bertrand because of his experience. It kind of makes sense, but ... Jose Bosingwa.

Pre-match emails.

"An 11-0 win for Man United would see Newcastle slip in to 4th place," notes an optimistic Keith Angus.

"Regarding Villas-Boas, I've long believed he needs time and support," says Chuck Schick. "He needs to rebuild the team and cut off the deadwood. This being said, he is playing one piece of dead wood at leftback and one in midfield. Maybe he'll line them up 4-2-3-1 with Malouda wide left and Mata behind the striker. That would make a lot of sense and allow Essien and Meireles (though Romeu would be preferable to the latter) to add cover for the defence. Mata could then try and play Torres in more. Sadly, we all know he's going 4-3-3. He will play the uninspiring Malouda - who seems to prefer passing to the opposition than Torres - in midfield. And he's not given Bertrand a chance. Chelsea were never likely to win, so why not give young Ryan a chance? I suggest the board take it upon themselves to do the right thing - resign. They are the ones who repeatedly appoint the wrong man."

"Just thought I'd let you know that Piers Morgan is on the Fox Soccer Panel in the US Coverage," warns Tim Jarrett. "Has he often been a pundit? He just said both teams were facing "Armagedda" But im not sure what he was referring to - perhaps Man CIty winning the league. Is Armagedda even a word?" Is Piers Morgan even a human? I'm not saying he's not. I'm just asking the question.

"Must say, I'm impressed that an 'Appy 'Ammer like yourself is pals with Chelsea fans!" says Ryan Dunne. I'm a man of the people. "People, usually rightly, slag off "plastics" but surely one benefit of the Sky, Glory-Hunting age is that people can support Spurs (or Chelsea, or Arsenal) and have friends/lovers who support their rivals, without descending into the "blood feud" conflicts of old. Personally I'd obviously much rather have a partner who supported my team (the Glorious Glasgow Rangers) but, in the last analysis, choice of fitba team is hardly up there with personality/appropriate respect for Batman/sense of humour/being up for anything etc etc."

"And since you mentioned fashion, what is up with the Chelsea shorts?" says Linda Howard, before going on to explain precisely what is up with the Chelsea shorts. "They seem to have been tailored so that even I would have a bulge. Some of us get distracted, for heaven's sake."

Fashion update: Sir Alex Ferguson is wearing a white polo neck underneath a black blazer. He looks like a vicar. Call Hadley Freeman now.

Here's a text off a friend at the game: "The England Under-21 left-back and captain [Ryan Bertrand] is on the bench and that ******* clown Bosingwa starts out of position. Malouda? Really? We're going to get minced." He supports Chelsea.

Judging by the reaction of Chelsea fans of my acquaintance, no one's especially happy to see Jose Bosingwa up against Antonio Valencia. Or Florent Malouda in midfield. That does look like a desperately average Chelsea side. They're going to have to play exceptionally well to get anything out of this.

Manchester United haven't won at Chelsea in the league since 20 April 2002. Ten years. A miserable record, especially as Chelsea have been managed by Avram Grant in that time. And to think people quibble about Tottenham's record at Old Trafford. These are meant to be the champions of England, and they can't even win at a ground where Chelsea didn't lose for 86 matches, a run spanning four years and eight months. Oh.

Only four players, two on each side, remain from that match. United won 3-0, a victory that wasn't enough to stop Arsenal finally sealing the league title at Old Trafford a couple of weeks later. No prizes for guessing which players we're looking for here. For Chelsea, it's former England captain John Terry and Frank Lampard. For United, it's Ryan Giggs and Paul Scholes, who gave Lampard a lesson that afternoon and may be about to give him another one today. Scholes got United on their way, scoring a trademark 25-yarder, a fine way to end a season which began with him being messed about following the arrival of Juan Sebastian Veron. There have been a few occasions heralded as the end of Scholes, but here he still is, running the show against Liverpool at last weekend and against Stoke on Tuesday, like a dad pulling the strings in a game with his kids down the park. "Och, he's got feathers in his feet," purred Sir Alex Ferguson after the 2-0 win over Tony Pulis's side.

Still, the return of Scholes from retirement last month, as romantic as it is, does demonstrate the problems facing United, who decided the best way to replace Paul Scholes is with Paul Scholes. Accept no lesser imitations and all that, but the lack of care given to their midfield over the last few years is the major factor holding this side back from truly challenging the best in Europe. In that context, it is remarkable that they are still keeping up with Manchester City, a bit like when you chop garlic and the smell follows you around for days. Despite not playing that well against Stoke, there was never really any doubt that United would eventually find a way.

They haven't had many better opportunities to end their dismal run at Stamford Bridge than this. There remains the possibility that Chelsea might suddenly rediscover their former swagger at some point this season, but it's looking increasingly unlikely. If United need an example of the dangers of standing still, look no further. Where the blame lies for Chelsea's slump isn't immediately clear. On the one hand, we constantly hear of a squad full of difficult characters who need taking down a peg or two and who haven't won nearly as much as their egos would suggest.

Add to that an inconsistent transfer policy – it's hard to name too many obvious successful signings since 2006 – and constantly changing managers, and it would appear that Andre Villas-Boas needs time and support from above. Don't hold your breath. On the other hand, even with some of the old guard sent off to the glue factory, Chelsea still don't have any obvious style or philosophy on the pitch. With all this talk of former players, now wouldn't be the worst time for the old Fernando Torres to come out of hiding.

Teams: Were any of the Chelsea substitutes alive the last time United won at Stamford Bridge?

Chelsea (4-3-3): Cech; Ivanovic, Cahill, Luiz, Bosingwa; Essien, Meireles, Malouda; Sturridge, Torres, Mata. Subs: Turnbull, Ferreira, Bertrand, Hutchinson, Romeu, Piazon, Lukaku.

Manchester United (4-4-2): De Gea; Rafael, Evans, Ferdinand, Evra: Valencia Giggs, Carrick, Young; Rooney, Welbeck. Subs: Amos, Fabio, Park, Berbatov, Pogba, Hernandez, Scholes.

Referee: Howard Webb.

Papiss Demba Cissé scored a sensational winning goal on his debut to lift Newcaste into fifth place in the table

Preamble

Brrrrrrr. It's Sunday, it's snowing, so why isn't Britain broken? Damn you Southern Trains! I fancied a snow day today. Ah well, if today's early fixture is anything like as extraordinary as last season's – when Newcastle demolished Villa 6-0 at St James' Park and, wait for it you'll like this, Andy Carroll scored a hat-trick – I should be suitably warm by mid-afternoon. There could be plenty of goals today too, particularly if Demba Ba plays better than he did in the Africa Cup of Nations.

And in an exciting live development the Newcastle team has just dropped on the wires and he does indeed start. But his Senegal team-mate and new signing Papiss Demba Cissé is only on the bench. Yohan Cabaye is still supended so doesn't start in midfield and nor does Cheick Tioté (on Africa Cup of Nations duty) who I feel is as important for Newcastle as Ba is. His influence is huge. Danny Guthrie's performance in midfield may decide which way this game swings, as I expect Villa to be busy in the middle with Robbie Keane dropping deep to assist Stilian Petrov, Ciaran Clark and Stephen Ireland. Jinky middle man Hatem Ben Arfa is left on the bench by Alan Pardew, by the way. I find that a little odd, but not as odd as the knowledge that it hasn't snowed all that much in Newcastle.

Aston Villa's Shay Given can expect a warm reception from the home fans today in his first game back at St James' Park since he left in 2009. Whereas Darren Bent can expect a hot one seeing as he used to play for Sunderland.

My prediction: This will be fun (Newcastle 3-2 Aston Villa)

The teams

Newcastle: Krul, Simpson, Williamson, Coloccini, Santon, Ryan Taylor, Guthrie, Perch, Gutierrez, Ba, Best. Subs: Elliot, Cisse, Ben Arfa, Gosling, Shola Ameobi, Obertan, Ferguson.
Aston Villa: Given, Hutton, Cuellar, Dunne, Warnock, Ireland, Petrov, Clark, N'Zogbia, Keane, Bent. Subs: Guzan, Heskey, Bannan, Weimann, Lichaj, Baker, Gardner.
Referee: Mark Halsey (Lancashire)

1.15pm: It's worth noting how important this match is for the two teams today. If Newcastle win they can join fourth-placed Chelsea on 42 points. Did anyone ever expect that to be the case … in February? While Villa could go into the top half of the table. And with Alex McLeish facing contant criticism from Villa fans for being, well, Alex McLeish, that would help him in his battle to win over at least one fan. Villa's prosaic football often doesn't help his cause either, mind.

1.19pm: Some classic Premier League stuff, courtesy of my colleague Jacob Steinberg. Some of this today would be nice …

1.23pm: An email from the Silver Fox: " Spent the morning over the park with the children. Only wore a pair of trainers instead of wellies and I still can't feel my toes now. Anyway, enough of that. Thanks for tipping us for another 3-2 defeat! Still not got over last week's capitulation. We will miss Agbonlahor and Albrighton today, it's about time N'Zogbia started to get into his stride. Scored the other night so hopefully he will be amongst them again today. Just devastated to see Warnock still in the starting line up. The man is a liability and should be put out to pasture." Ryan Taylor isn't the quickest right midfielder around though, so perhaps that's why McLeish trusts him to do a job today, despite his own goal last time out.

1.27pm: The teams emerge to a subdued sounding reception. I'm not gonna hype this for effect. Expected a bit more noise. Anyway here's my colleague Tom Bryant with a theory: "Last time Villa beat Newcastle at St James' Park, Joey Barton got sent off for fighting with team-mate Kieron Dyer. Given that today he's trying to start on the entire world, does that bode well for Villa to shellack the Toon?" Erm, no Tom. But it does allow me to fill the 1.27pm email-entry slot in the absence of any others.

Kick-off: We're off. Stephen Ireland makes a meaty challenge on Newcastle's Perch and Ryan Taylor has a cross from the right headed clear. Bent stretches his legs to no avail as he chases after a Cuellar hoof clear. It's a messy start if ever I've seen one.

3 min: It already looks quite congested in the middle with Ba dropping deep looking for the ball when Newcastle gain possession. Gutierrez, whose name the Newcastle fans are singing gleefully, tries to slide Ba through behind Dunne, but his pass isn't hit hard enough and the defender cuts it out.

5 min: Taylor tries a similar pass from the right looking to thread it through to Ba behind Cuellar this time. The defender stretches to cut it out but it's obvious that Newcastle are targeting the lack of pace in Villa's defence by playing the ball in behind them. Nzogbia needs a decent game today. The left-footed shot that he sends miles wide suggests he's not going to have one. Keane did well to set him up, though.

8 min: Ba shows the Cup of Nations side of his game with a dreadfully misplaced pass back into midfield straight to Ireland when Guthrie was within feet of him.

10 min: Villa have hit some hopeless long balls in the direction of Bent. Newcastle already look more comfortable in possession. Guthrie steps in with authority to win the ball back in midfield after Ba does a better job of holding the ball up on the halfway line, the midfielder slides Best into the inside right channel and cuts inside, but Cuellar blocks his shot and leaves Best clutching his knee. He could be knacked.

12 min: Best hobbles off, which means Newcastle fans will get to see the Senegal attack in action earlier than expected. While Cissé waits to come on, Keane shows great craft on the edge of the Newcastle box to spin to his left and slide Bent in on the left-hand side of the box. He is beaten by the narrowing angle, though, and his well-struck shot is saved by Krul.

14 min: Best is off and Cissé is on to rapturous Geordie applause. He comes on with Villa in the ascendancy, though.

15 min: Cissé gets an early effort on target. It's a good header, 10 yards out and level with the near post, leaping higher than Warnock and forcing Given into an easy save.

17 min: Keane has come to life for Villa in the last five minutes. His awareness of the space around him betrays his tendency in the past to look like he's rushing everything he does. His clever threaded passes and movement make it look like he's got time to spare as he picks his passes.

20 min: Ba has a crack from 35 yards. Dunne gets his considerable frame in the way of it and the ball spins out for a corner.

21 min: You probably guessed that Ryan Taylor's corner, like 99% of those ever taken by anyone ever, didn't beat the first man.

The Blame Tom Bryant Department: "It was Lee Bowyer who fought with Dyer, not Barton. This was over two years before Barton signed for Newcastle. Surely a job on the Daily Record would be more suited to Mr Bryant's ability, or lack thereof, to use facts," chides Shaun Clapperton.

23 min: Warnock sends a stray pass in-field after looking up and seeing Bob Hope of a pass forwards. He then cracks his head and is left prone on the field for a few worrying minutes. He gets up eventually and gingerly makes his way back on to the pitch. Poor old Stephen Warnock.

26 min: Perch, Guthrie and Ba link up well before Ba finds Simpson on the overlap outside him on the right winfg. He takes a touch and plays a low cross towards the back of the area, where Cissé chests the ball cleverly over Cuellar, but is crowded out as he tries to unleash a shot at goal.

29 min: Goal! Newcastle 1-0 Aston Villa (Ba, obviously). Normal service is resumed. Guthrie plays a ball in from the left wing, swinging it in towards the penalty area. Dunne can only head the ball as far as the penalty spot, where Taylor's shot is deflected by Warnock into the path of Ba, who takes one touch eight yards out, before rifling home into the left side of the gaping net.

31 min: Ba is joined in celebration in the corner by his Senegalese team-mate Cissé. The bad news for Newcastle, though, is that Taylor knacked his right leg in the challenge with Warnock when following up. He is carried off on a stretcher looking in an awful lot of pain.

34 min: Obertan replaces Taylor. It's worth noting that Villa had a great chance just before the Newcastle goal when Dunne (yes Dunne!) played in Bent with a perfectly-weighted pass. Bent has looked dangerous. His pace is a constant threat and Keane has linked up well with him. It's not all gloomy for Villa by any stretch.

37 min: If there's something to collide with, Stephen Warnock will find it. He slides to clear the ball in the left-back position (yes, he was in position, Villa fans) and bounces up off the pitch and into the advertisement boards chest-first. He's on his feet again, much to the Villa fans' disapointment. He's been a bit of a shambles so far.

41 min: There was a rare bit of invention from Villa then that didn't involve Keane. Petrov shaped to whip a free-kick in from the right, but deceived everyone by cutting it back across the edge of the box to Ireland, who curls a shot inches wide of the left-hand post. Bent went close with a shot just moments before, but found the sidenetting after being forced wide.

43 min: "Re 21 mins, you've been watching Liverpool too much. Players other than Charlie Adam have got their 'hit the 1st defender' percentage down to a solid 78%," parps Niall Mullen. A Villa corner comes to naff all just as Niall pipes up. Although whether it beat the first man is hard to say as it was angled so far away from goal as to almost work its way out of consideration as a corner.

45 min: Villa get lucky after some slipshod defending almost gifts Cissé a debut goal. Guthrie, from the right, whips a ball into the Corridor of Uncertainty TM where Cuellar flicks his attempted headed clearance into the path of Cissé. But the after getting in front of Hutton, the Senegalese pokes wide while off-balance from eight yards out.

45+5min: Goal! Newcastle 1-1 Aston Villa (Keane) Nzogbia does something! With the half petering out Nzogbia turns on the afterburners and roasts Obertan on the left wing, racing to the byline and crossing low into the path of Keane, who times his run to perfection to finish simply into the enpty net with Krul stranded. Keane deserved that, he's been Villa's best player by far.

Half-time
Well, 1-1 is probably a fair reflection of that half. Newcastle have dominated possession but Villa have threatened on the break. Nzogbia's pace was electric to create the goal, and like Bent earlier, he stretched the Newcastle defence and made them look vulnerable. Your emails to follow …

Some emails

An embarrassed colleague writes: "Of course it was: Bowyer, Barton - they both begin with a B. It's confusing. Shaun Clapperton wins a prize, selected at random from my desk. So empty cardboard coffee cup, today's Observer, pen lid, half-eaten bag of crisps or a pink badge with a smiley face. Take your pick Shaun." Tom Bryant's a generous man, Shaun, you've got to admit.

"On a weekend of red cards, that lunge from Warnock [before Ba's goal] is the most obvious of them all. Usual nonsense from ex-pros on commentary. Disgraceful foul," writes Gary Naylor. I've just seen the replay, Gary, and I agree with you. It's a lunge, and while he may have been attempting to block the ball, it could easily have broken Ryan Taylor's leg. Thankfully, the early indications are that he hasn't.

Silver Fox is back and Stephen Warnock hasn't exactly endeared himself to him after that shambolic first-half showing. "So you're seeing what I mean about him. It's not just recently he has been this poor - its all flaming season. Maybe the ginger judas can't see to the other side of the pitch which is why he is still in the team. A typical Villa half. Lots of huff and puff, very little end product and happy to concede on their first proper attack. And then we equalise - typical. Got to get Warnock off at half time still. Absolutely dreadful but will take the cheeky equaliser - they are there for the taking I reckon. As an aside, I played someone on PES the other night (he was Napoli) and Heskey scored a hat trick of header, left foot and right foot. The poor lad I beat was mortified - imagine conceding a hat trick to the Lump. The shame." I reckon you ramped Heskey's stats up. To believe that would require an unrealistic stretch of one's imagination.

A tweet: "What is the plural of Demba? Dembas? Dembois? Dembaii?"

45 min: Stephen Ireland has been replaced by Barry Bannan. After mentioning Ireland in my first-minute entry I actually forgot he was playing. I don't know if he touched the ball again after that. He was being played on the right, mind. Seems a better fit in the centre.

47 min: Guthrie, who is a player I think is growing in stature this season, whips a lovely ball in to the penalty area from the left that causes an almighty mix-up between Cuellar, Dunne and Given, the ball bouncing an inch from Ba and ricocheting among the defenders and goalkeeper, before Dunne gets a size 10 to it and jabs it straight at Cissé's head. Before Cissé can get a shot off Dunne does a better job of clearing it and Villa breathe again. That's a shaky start to the second half for Villa.

50 min: Newcastle have started the half very positively. Guthrie sweeps a wonderful ball from left to right, all of 45 yards, to Obertan, who doesn't seem to read it and can't reach it before it goes out of play. That was shoddy by Obertan. But not surprising, really. He's not the best is he?

52 min: It's a mistake by that man Warnock again. Cissé nicks possession off him on the halfway line after the left-back was guilty of dawdling on the ball like a pensioner playing five-a-side. Only a poor touch by Cissé and his team-mates get him out of jail. Warnock's having a shocker.

53 min: Newcastle continue to press. Obertan makes another poor decision after being played into the inside-right channel and being given the chance to test Dunne for pace. But Obertan doesn't fancy himself and takes an early, shocking clout with his right foot, the ball spinning off his boot up and away, yards right of the goal. I once remember a Man City fan telling me that Dunne is "fast in a straight line". Really?

56 min: Newcastle are controlling this now. Guthrie and Perch are working phenomenally hard in midfield to keep the tempo up and regain possession at every opportunity. As much as Obertan hasn't had the best game, he is seeing a lot of the ball. Well, he would do, with Warnock at left-back.

60 min: Guttierez shows great power and pace on the left to force Bannan into dragging him down. The free-kick is cleared but after a second-wave attack, Guthrie picks out Cissé, who unmarked and 10 yards out, heads over wastefully. That was his big moment. And he fluffed it.

63 min: "The badge sounds almost appealing," writes Tom Bryant's tormentor, Shaun Clapperton. "Good to see Tom took it in the spirit intended too." That was a happy-clappy ending, Shaun. You should have gone for the jugular. Newcastle are completely bossing this. Their passing is crisp, accurate and quick. Obertan has a shot blocked but Villa just can't keep hold of possession when they regain it. Newcastle have had 75% of it in the last 10 minutes.

66 min: Nzogbia off and Heskey on. Alex McLeish must enjoy being hated.

68 min: The Villa fans give McLeish an earful after that baffling substitution. Villa create a chance, mind. And it's Warnock who creates it. Yup. A decent cross in from the left that Bent slams straight at Cuellar, who blocks diligently. Villa win a free-kick after Keane is felled. It's played short and Hutton forces a corner.

70 min: Bannan does his bit to breathe life into the art of taking a corner, by whipping it in OVER THE FIRST MAN, but it is cleared.

72 min: Goal! Newcastle 2-1 Aston Villa (Cissé). Hello! This is a stunner. Gutierrez rampages up the left-hand side and and cuts a cross back to the edge of the box where the new-signing has cleverly found space between Warnock and Dunne. He takes one touch and unleases a blistering left-footed strike into the top-left hand corner that couldn't be stopped by two Shay Givens. Welcome to Tyneside.

74 min: January's striker signings have done all right. Zamora, Cissé and, erm, Cissé all profiting. Newcastle have been much the better side this half. They have been much more controlled than they were in the first half. Alan Pardew eh?

76 min: Cissé is flagged offside after Gutierrez played an angled ball in behind the Villa defence. He was half a yard off. So while Newcastle continue to dominate, here's an email. "It's rare that I thoroughly disagree with Lord Naylor, " begins Niall Mullen, showing Gary Naylor far too much respect, "but Warnock's challenge was an obvious attempt to block, he wasn't out of control and Taylor's injury came from kicking his foot. The pundits did cone up with the usual 'not that sort of player' guff which made me wonder whether it was a reckless tackle. It wasn't." If I can pipe up here Niall, the replays showed that the risk of serious injury from the tackle/block was pretty high. And the referees seem to have been disregarding intent when making decisions this season and penalising any challenge where serious injury is possible. This comes into that category but perhaps blocks are a grey area. Anyway, back to the match …

81 min: Cissé sends a shuddering volley a yard wide after the ball drops to him on the edge of the box. Given had it covered but it was a fantastic hit. There's some amount of biff in his left boot.

82 min: Villa come to life, at last. Ciaran Clark thunders a shot straight down Krul's throat after Bent had latched on to a pass in behind Newcastle's defence but found himself pegged back.

85 min: It's Clark's last touch. On in his stead is Gary Gardner, who sounds like a local commercial radio station DJ. He has a great chance with his first touch, but curls his attempted strike over from 18 yards after Petrov put a pass in front of him that he should have relished. There was no belief in his effort. He's 19, mind and he's got an uncool name. I'd lack belief if I was him.

87 min: Hang on! Villa are having a right old go now. Gardner goes close again. Bannan curls an inswinging come-and-hit-me ball in from the right that Gardner glances at goal, but Coloccini gets in the way of it and the ball deflects fortuitously straight into the path of Krul. He spills it and with Heskey ambling in, he grabs it at the second attempt.

89 min: Ba is given a rousing standing ovation as he departs and on in his place is Shola Ameobi. Three minutes of injury time.

90+1 min: Newcastle are holding the ball in the corner to waste a few seconds and let me get another email in: "Can I ask whether your use of the ">" sign (45, 56, 74 mins) is another example of youth punctuation like #thisone (the meaning of which I'm proud to say has passed me by at the age of 32)? I can't even say that I'm fascinated by this question having typed it: may have more to do with the fact that it's 11.15pm on Sunday in Singapore and I'm (still) at work... Perhaps more to the point, I think that more mbm effort needs to go into a collective name for the newcastle strikeforce. Three minutes to get that done, off you go," writes James Arrandale. Erm. I reckon the > is an underused symbol. Nah it's probably my oaf-like fingers missing the target like Andy Carroll.

Full-time: Newcastle hold possession astutely and seal the three points to move level with Chelsea in the table, the Dembaes (is that the right collective name?) doing for Newcastle what they couldn't do for Senegal at the Africa Cup of Nations and scoring a goal apiece. Cissé's debut goal was simply sensational. It's still early days but it looks like Pardew has been decisive in the transfer market again and signed another cracker. Thanks for all your emails. Now join Jacob Steinberg for Chelsea v Manchester United.

• Game postponed on spectator safety grounds
• 'The pitch is fine and inside the stadium is safe and dry'

Derby County's Championship match with their local rivals Nottingham Forest has been postponed on safety grounds, the club have confirmed.

The match was due to kick off at 12.15pm on Sunday but heavy snow has left roads and pavements around the ground dangerous, and the club have called off the fixture after discussions with the match officials, police, the Football League and Forest.

The Derby chief executive, Tom Glick, told the club's website: "The pitch is fine and inside the stadium is safe and dry. However, the roads throughout the city and county are unsafe. This is the biggest match of the year for our supporters and we wouldn't want anyone to miss it because they had difficulty getting to Pride Park Stadium."

The game was due to go ahead less than 24 hours after it was announced that the Nottingham Forest owner, Nigel Doughty, had been found dead at his home in Lincolnshire.